Weekly Trip to the Library

How to Say it To Your Kids by Dr. Paul Coleman

Dr. Paul Coleman, a family therapist and father, reveals the six fundamental approaches to talking with children. Forming the mnemonic TENDER -- Teach, Empathize, Negotiate, Do's & Don'ts, Encourage, and Report -- these six basic ways of communicating cover every conceivable issue of concern.

Each short chapter opens with an anecdote, followed by related factual information, a section on how to respond to a child on the subject, and a warning section on how not to respond on topics such as how to speak to a child about dawdling, bullying, or self confidence.

Each chapter consists of practical, how-to advice based on various scenarios, sidebars with new insights to the issues important to caregivers. Some of the short and sweet tips included include: the best reward for a child is a responsive parent, don't respond with a tone of voice more intense than the child's, and if anxiety is high it is not a time to lecture or give advice

This is a reference manual for nannies to turn to again and again as the children age and new problems, and tougher questions emerge. Loaded with ready-to-use-information, this is a great reference for nannies can come to for a new idea or strategy that can be instantly applied.