The scandal that Arnold Schwarzenegger fathered a child with his housekeeper is all over the news. Rumors suggest that the relationship was consensual.
I am not implying that any domestic worker that reads our blog or subscribes to our newsletter would ever have a romantic (or sexual) relationship with an employer, but would like to know how domestic workers deal with being attracted to an employer, and are able to keep the relationship strictly professional.
Have you ever been attracted to an employer? If so, how did you deal with those feelings?
What advice to you have for a nanny or au pair that has a crush on their employer?
No but one father i worked for on Long Island would gawk at me. I overheard him tell his friend he had a good view when I was watching his kids at their home pool. I quit within a few weeks after I overheard that. I never "reported" it but probably should have so the agency wouldn't place anyone else with him. I was young though and scared didn't know how to do that.
ReplyDeleteNope. Although one of them used to walk around in his underwear a lot (but I just ignored it, he did it around everyone)
ReplyDeleteI had one dad-boss who a bit over-friendly. I HATED it. I quit after 3 months. Never told his wife because a) he never really did anything and b) I didn't know how to bring it up. Luckily I had been offered another job.
I didn't take a job for this reason. Both the father and teen son were attractive so I just accepted a different job.
ReplyDeleteI have a nanny friend that dressed too sexually and was kicked out. family was right since they asked her number of times to dress differently. she even wore lace camisoles around the house. she was in the wrong i think.
ReplyDeletethen another nanny felt uncomfortable with comments by dad. she told dad to stop. when he didn't she called the agency. agency actually moved her out, helped pay for hotel, and got her a new job!! the agency is great!
Thank god no!
ReplyDeleteI always meet the dads before I accept a job. A few jobs I turned down, because the dads gave me the creeps.
ReplyDeleteHappy to say all the dads I've worked for were all respectful- but playing the part of always being professional and putting up boundaries are key. You also want the mothers to be comfortable enough to trust you too.
Michelle:
ReplyDeleteIF you are professional you just do not go there its GROSS !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lora:
Quit. :) But I wouldn't have that problem with Arnold. Maybe the rock. Definitely the rock.
Lisa:
Keep the boundaries in tact. And if that doesn't work leave. We've seen how much this is impacting Maria and his four kids.
Pam:
It has never happened w/me. I agree with the professionalism part. If the employer makes sexual advances at the employee, perhaps it is time to find another nanny job!
Andrea:
@Lora....ROTF ;-D
Debbie:
It's embarrassing but I turned down a job with an attractive father and teen son once. Just accepted a differnt job.
Michelle:
I am so sorry but its just not funny no matter who he may be or how good looking he is I have been a nanny for 27 yrs and I have worked for some amazing familes (5) 2 of these jobs I prbably had a better relationship with the fathers thean the mothers , as I consider myself a prfessional Nanny at all times . Next year I am retiring :)
Nannies from Downunder:
As a nanny Ive had fathers make passes at me....my usually response is do it again and I will deck you! Then I start looking for a new job!