Nannies love the children in their care but they must always remember that they are not the parents. Despite the best of intentions and years of experience nannies may have with sleep training infants and potty training toddlers, most parents want to determine how to raise their little ones.
Sometimes parents are happy to allow their nannies to take control of developmental matters, like sleep and potty training. But the majority of parents want their caregivers to follow their directives. Unless asked for, it's best for nannies to bite-their-tongue and not force unwanted advice on the parents that employ them.
For example, what could be worse for parents who co-sleep with their children to find out their nanny doesn't approve of attachment parenting and refuses to rock the infant to sleep, but lets the baby cry-it-out in her crib alone instead?
Although it's great when toddlers use the potty while their nannies are on duty, it's unfair for caregivers to criticize the parents when children wet their pants or beds on the weekend when the parents are in charge.
Nannies should always share any developmental milestones they experience during the work day with the parents. Caregivers just have to watch their tone so not to rub-it-in when they have seen developmental milestones the parents missed.
Parents are insecure about their abilities too. Nannies are not hired to render the parents useless. Nannies must always remember that they are hired to support the parents, not defy them.
Stop by next Monday for more advice about Respecting Professional Boundaries for Nannies and Parents.
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